I once remember a colleague refusing to tell anyone how old she was. She looked to me to be roughly my age and at the time I was in my thirties i.e. really not that old. The more she refused, the more people were desperate to know. She couldn’t even provide a reason as to why she didn’t want anyone to know. Apparently, not even her boyfriend knew. This obviously led us all to wonder how old could she possibly be to go to such extreme lengths to ensure that nobody found out.
For years, it has always been said that you should never ask a lady how old she is. For years, when a woman has revealed her age it is quite often begrudgingly or with shame. I am of course referring to women of a certain age. Women in their twenties will happily announce that actually they are 28 with some pride and so they should. So, why is it that once women reach a certain age threshold that that pride dwindles away and is only met with remorse.
I have never, quite frankly, understood this. Surely, the older you get, the more proud you should feel of your age? As someone once said “Do not regret growing old, it is a privilege denied to many” (I have relentlessly tried to find out who originally said that quote, but to no avail) or to put it frankly as the French actor Maurice Chevalier said “Old age isn’t so bad when you think of the alternative”. I bear this in mind as I approach my 40th Birthday next week. Without sounding too morose, I think of the friends who haven’t got this far and I feel almost disgusted at the thought of feeling pity or shame about turning 40 when the privilege wasn’t afforded to them. Therefore, I simply cannot understand why someone would be full of regret that they have lived another year.
I understand that some people might be ashamed of how old they are as they feel that they haven’t achieved much in the time they’ve been on this earth, but this doesn’t mean you should be ashamed of your age (and mate, I reckon what you’ve achieved in your life will be a hell of a lot more than some people have. Plus what’s all this excitement about “achievement” anyway. If you’re healthy and have people that love you, you’re doing pretty bloody well).
I believe we all should (and women in particular) hold our heads high when we inform someone how old we are. I think people should say it with a smile on their face and be almost obnoxious about it. I think one’s age, no matter how old you are, is an achievement. Life is hard and not everyone gets as far down the road as they would have liked or as we would have liked. So next week, when I turn 40 and despite the fact that the other day when I sneezed I tore a muscle in my stomach and have a dodgy back, I will be elated that I made it this far and will wish for many more Birthdays to come. Also, personally as a parent, every year is worth celebrating as that means I’ve watched my child grow for another year and if that’s not something to be proud of, I don’t know what is.
Just Another Blog From a Woman 
I’m totally proud to have just turned 40 too! Go you! (though I have to admit giggling at the torn muscle after sneezing – you poor girl!)
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I know! As if I don’t have enough going on! I think our 40’s is the coolest age xx
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I’m 45 this year and fully embrace it! My forties are so much more fun than my thirties ever were! 🙂
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Brilliant Shelley x
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I might not be old enough yet, but I have never been ashamed or afraid of my age. A lot of my friends freaked out about turning 30 and I have never understood why. I hope I will continue to feel the same way as I get older.
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Yes! Excellent.
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40 is awesome!
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It’s the best! X
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I hated turning 30, mainly because some very unpleasant things happened on that day. The big birthdays since have been fine.
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Good to hear April.
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I’m 40 in September and I’m looking forward to celebrating very disgracefully! My parents are both 63 this year, and they haven’t grown up yet so why should I 😊
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Growing up is so overrated! Love the sound of your parents!
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Great post! We need to embrace growing older and appreciate the wisdom we’ve obtained from living for so long! 🙂
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I completely agree Lisa and thank you x
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You’re welcome!
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I’m so glad you wrote this post! Just this last week I was talking with a co-worker and I realized I mention my age (42) a lot. When I turned 40 I made the conscious decision that I wouldn’t ever be afraid of my age, that I would embrace it and love the life I’d lived–all the warts and bumps included. I know I’m still affected by the societal pressure of women in particular to be young and beautiful–I almost didn’t agree to date my now husband because he’s 4 years younger. What if he got more attractive with age and I didn’t? Even as I write that I know it’s silly. . . but it’s true.
I love this post, and your perspective on your upcoming birthday. It’s absolutely true that forty is fabulous. I’ve never been happier.
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This is it Angela. The pressure that society puts on women to stay young & beautiful is unforgivable. I’m glad you decided to go on that date with your husband! Many congratulations by the way xx
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Thank you! 🙂
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I’m turning 34 this year and have already started to cringe when I say my age. So after reading your post I’m going to make an effort to actually embrace it when asked instead of coiling.
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YES! So happy to hear this. Say it loud! Say it proud!
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Waaay belated happy birthday! Completely agree – I’ve never been shy about announcing my age, and couldn’t understand a co-worker years ago who actually convinced her youngster that she turned 24 each and every birthday (I think he believed it until he was 9). I’m turning 52 in July, and life is only getting better! Oh, and early happy birthday for this coming April! 😀
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Thank you Traci. So great to hear I’ve got another “I’m-not-ashamed-of-my-age” friend!
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I’m 63 and though I still have a hard time believing it I’m not ashamed of it. I do appreciate the years of life I’ve been blessed with. So enjoy your youth. It will be gone in a flash!
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Thank you! Am so happy to hear you’re not ashamed of your wonderful age (also thank you for referring to 40s as youth. I’m loving my 40s EVEN more now) xx
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I really enjoyed this post, as I’m 56 but I don’t feel it. I’m grateful for every year I get and am loving life. All the best to you. 😊
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Good for you! We should all be grateful for every year we get on this planet & with our families x
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What is that saying, oh yes, “Age is just a number”, “40 is the new 30”. Enjoy Hayley as I am sure you will 🙂
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Thanks Suzanne. I’m just rehashing an old blog post (I turned 40 last year), but I absolutely agree. Age is most definitely a number.
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Duh, how did I miss that 🙂 Maybe reading too fast!!! Sorry, Hayley! I suppose I could rehash the comment for your 50th? 🙂
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Absolutely no worries at all, Suzanne. Haha yes definitely send me that comment again in 9yrs.
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So much on point! And hey I turn 40 next April! Looks like we may be birthday buddies! 😀
Mine’s on the 15th. When’s yours?
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Almost! I’m the 13th! So close. Yay hope you enjoy your 40th x
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I am 51 in August but my 40’s weren’t so bad. Happy Birthday in advance. Keep on blogging.
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